everything is green
everything is green ... da da da
I am again because, quite simply, without any brain left turns are allowed over there. while I was cleaning and just biting the dental floss slept through my teeth, I realized this little planet on which I dwell, and the threat day after day, tomorrow, for tomorrow, yes, almost always to break. It all depends - oh yes - and only your fault. You are everything I had. You're jealous because I'm new hobbies chose it because I have friends who I adore and I would do anything. I am subject to your dictatorship does not seem to escape and to be able to. The logic is that no logic exists. you hold me in your net-caught nine points and will not release me. if ... so if ... if not what would? who or what contributes to the fact that every time it gets that far? why I fear the day dawn, before the next? why I want to sleep and not wake up the most? why I feel bad when I publish such thoughts, and I know that some people might give care. yes, I'm afraid. terrified to wake up tomorrow and before the to be the same mess that has been mostly left over night. it is every morning the same decision that I will answer negatively. what keeps me in you? Is it the way in which you torture me, me so hypnotized? I long after the painful muscles of me when you see me as one of your daring adventures lead them astray? It is not a number or one or perhaps two have masochistic, leading to a friendship with you? you torment me still. not everyone can claim that he would approve it. It terrified me so - the thought of being tortured, to be empty - to feel nothing. I am - standing for hours in a large white space. the only, to which I come, I tear open the nail beds to suffer and bleed, to punish me for that I am not even arrived back against you, even though my fate with the first step to get up in was sealed. why do I feign healthy by the words I "I want to be healthy!" According to a moving car from the bellow and you look inside a abkicherst, as you know anyway that I - will arrive in your anus ass crawling - perhaps even hours later. who gave you the right at all to know this? well, you know like me so now 2 years old - but this need not have long to say that I am completely controlled by you. when I think more closely about this is true, however. you control everything, take everything to me and give me back something. even if that something in the first moments is perceived as happiness of performance, it is only later, but a further step, the working towards my death. captured, imprisoned in a dictatorship of anorexia, a dictatorship of you. as I mentioned before in x line, I have even now quite afraid to get up tomorrow. up the in-itself, is not the problem, but wonder what I eat, how I earn my breakfast this in order to train it calorie consumption by later muskelnzerrendes. it is fear. the fear that compels me to go on and on, to sacrifice more and more. sometimes have I feel you're a megalomaniac. things that I do. things for which I am ashamed. Man, what am I glad that only two of us about the complexity and scale these things know. you could still say that I was crazy! ha! I do not laugh. you're crazy. the only thing that could be mad at my behavior, if I obey you. I admit - it excites me to go to my limits and everything, including live this mikrige small risk - but I do have something of a fear of death. to me the time anyway schnubbi worse can come any more. would not the first time that I'm on the over-lying trail ride facing backwards. I do, but even the whole time - I am going to against the wind, against this tornado, the pull me out at some point perhaps there is even free.
me plägt all Sun I'm afraid. Just let me rest in. I want to do sport, yes, but I want to coordinate themselves. I want to be strong without you. strong, ambitious, successful - without you!
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